Why HUGE PUSSY?

Why HUGE PUSSY?

I didn't plan on doing this, but I can't stand by and do nothing when gender inequity pervades my rights as an American citizen. I am a feminist, activist and mother, and with the support of my kids, I wrote, produced and directed a sketch comedy show last year. A feminist show about gender inequality, it brings humor to the constant shaming and objectification of female sexuality, which I had been writing about more seriously for the past couple of years. The show is set in a fantasy world where buying magnum-sized tampons is a turn on, doing housework is orgasmic and yes, being called a pussy is high-praise. It's kind of silly and a bit raunchy, but my family encouraged me to take a risk and I did. The other writing I had been doing is about how shaming the body censors the voice and disables one's ability to be lead an empowered life. Reading Nicholas Kristoff's book Half the Sky changed my life and inspired me to help other women but first I had to deal with the shame I had been harboring myself for decades. As a 44 year old woman, it might have seemed a waste to reconcile things that happened so long ago, but I decided the last thing I wanted to exemplify to my children was how to live in fear. So I wrote about my own experiences of childhood trauma, teenage pregnancy, eating disorders, addiction and rape that all played a part in the silencing of my own voice that is connected to the subjugation of the female psyche and therefore humanity at large. The reasons being: 1. so I don't pass down my unsorted garbage to my kids and 2. ensure that I am not part of the collective female silence. Call me a dreamer, but I believe it's my duty to use my rights to stand up and speak out for gender equality because if I was a woman in Saudi Arabia, I would not fare well for writing sketches with titles like Ass Man, Big Balls and Notorious VAG. Do I think my show will have any measurable effect on gender equality?-- Probably not, but at the very least, I have to try.

Once the show was done, I had a premiere and announced to a small following that it was coming out the next day on Amazon, but it didn't, because of the word pussy. Since I had titled one of the sketches Huge Pussy, it was flagged as "offensive content" and Amazon wouldn't publish it, until I changed the title. I hated doing it, especially because that sketch is about redefining the word pussy to mean strong, rather than weak, but I did. The sketch is called The P Word on Amazon and it felt altogether wrong since there was no problem with my sketch called Big Balls.  The latter had been accepted to a film festival in Hollywood, so I decided to take my daughter for spring break and go to the screening, but first, we would actually come up with a new definition for the word pussy, so I designed a tote bag with the new definition printed on it and we carried the bags on the red carpet. I loved the bag, but I was surprised that other people did too, so I designed a few more things.

Soon, I had Huge Pussy throw pillows on my sofa, Huge Pussy coffee mugs in my kitchen and Huge Pussy notebooks on my desk and they all made me really happy! When my daughter's friends would come over, I would hide the stuff, but when they finally saw it, they liked it too. It also may seem frivolous, but that bag started a conversation and it changed the meaning forever in my own family. I wrote the sketch in the first place because it had always bothered me that balls meant strong when pussy meant weak. It seemed really wrong to think that my son had been blessed with courage but my daughter plagued with weakness.  

When I went to register my new company I was denied the name, again because of the word pussy. This time though, I knew it wasn't an algorithm that flagged the word, but a human being who rejected a company with the following description "Huge Pussy Holdings Inc is a female-led company that offers socially-conscious products and entertainment that are proudly rooted in our American values to spread equality, freedom of speech and freedom of expression." Even after contesting the name, I was blocked. Yet, I had no problem starting a company called More Than Big Balls LLC that same day. 

I honestly could not believe it though when I went to get a new Gmail address and was not allowed hugepussylife@gmail.com but when I went to get bigballslife@gmail.com, the username was already taken. 

So why huge pussy? Because in the Miriam Webster dictionary, the definition of the word pussy is : weak, cowardly, effeminate / vulgar slang for women's genitals

and the definition of balls: testicles, courage or nerve 

So In the words of my 9-year-old niece, "that's just rude". 

I couldn't agree more.